Let’s do one at a time starting with the ‘other man.’ He is definitely looking for love in the wrong place and with the wrong person.
The point is a triangle happens when two married (or simply committed people) don’t fix their marriage.The work needed is usually in the area of developing a better tolerance for love and intimacy by clearing out whatever fears and blockage the guy has in the way.Then he can go after a whole and available single woman. He’s the ‘other man’s’ competition, but not really.In other instances his defenses are so thick he doesn’t read the signs at least consciously.Personally, I think most if not all married people know on some level if a spouse is cheating, but that’s just my belief.The important thing about the married man is he’s probably coping with his limited marriage by doing something else (work, alcohol, substances, whatever consumes and distracts him).
In some instances he ‘knows’ his wife is cheating on him and looks the other way.
If the ‘other man’ gets attached he will inevitably at some point start needing more from the married woman. My heart goes out to him more than any one else in this arrangement because he is usually the one who gets disturbed first and has more to lose.
He may start thinking about asking her to leave her husband. He could be thrown out of the triangle and the married couple could end up fixing their relationship, this could happen.
I know the storybooks tell us that it’s better to stay together.
But I think there are plenty of people who never should have gotten together to begin with.
The reality is he’s looking for love like the rest of us and afraid of what he’ll find.